The Shift

I spent many years totally confused by my own behavior,
watching myself make horrible choice after horrible choice,
as if from the passenger seat of my own life.
I went down a lot of rabbit holes looking for answers,
looking for a way to make sense out of the mess.
After finally opening up to my therapist, I was given the terms I needed like oxygen: ADHD + CPTSD.
Like a heavy rain after a long drought, I finally had what I needed to grow.

This is just my personal experience with these labels -
not all people like being labeled, and that’s completely valid.
For me, it brought clarity.
It explained the unexplainable.
It shifted my narrative from evil sinner to misunderstood human doing their best.
It opened up a pathway to healing.

You don’t need a diagnosis for this to ring true, though.
You don’t need to have a mental disorder to benefit from reframing.
If you’ve ever felt the ache of being “broken,”
if you’ve ever been told you’re “lazy” when you know that’s not what’s wrong,
if you’ve ever felt defeated by all the “coping skills” that do anything but help,
maybe you’re just using a different operating system.
Treat yourself gently.
You’re not broken.
You never were.

-A